~Plans Fluffle
2006-01-03 - 5:53 p.m.

I suppose that 25 is old enough to grow up a bit. I suppose most people are sort of forced to grow up sooner.

I've got half of my classroom at home (well a quarter at home and one quarter getting chauffered around in my car) and nowhere to put it. I'm 25, a qualified teacher, so of course I've got an adult's worth of possessions now, almost including furniture, which is crammed into my bedroom right now. Unfortunately, I don't own this house, so I only get a child's amount of space: one small bedroom and the generous bestowal of a shelf or two in the computer room.

I would have thought that Dianne moving out (and then finally taking her stuff, too) would mean that I could have some space in her old room. Apparently, that's not the case - and it's not just Dad who's being picky about this.

And I've considered...I don't pay rent here. Yes, I buy my own groceries and often by stuff for the main meals for everyone, and I generally look after myself, but I don't pay for toilet paper or washing detergent and I don't really help out with cleaning the house or anything like that. Perhaps I would if I was paying rent...Anyway, it occurred to me that maybe I should offer to pay some money each week as a kind of rent, and in return I would be entitled to more space in the house. Last year I could've afforded it easily.

The thing is, I've only just realised how poor I'm going to be next year! See, if I keep to the dates I've tentatively set, I'll go away just after one set of school holidays and return just before the next set, which means I miss out on most of a term's teaching. I won't get paid for holidays, of course. All up, I'll be lucky to get half of what I earned this year, unless I work every single day. It seems probably I'll easily work 4 days most weeks, but that's still not a guaranteed thing - and what about when I get sick or run down or something. One point of this year was that I could just not work some days if I wanted.

Anyway, I quite enjoy living with Mum, but Dad is really hard to live with. Just having that third adult is really hard, but Dad's really picky and unreasonable in many ways. He intends to retire some time this year, maybe May, maybe July...hopefully July! At the moment, he often leaves for work before I get home from school, so I have all evening to relax as I like - including watching whatever TV I like in the proper chairs. These holidays so far have been annoying because Mum & Dad are both (or alternately) being noisy til at least 1am, then getting up at 7 or 8am. Now, I need my sleep. In uni I suffered from insomnia. In the week leading up to Christmas I had four late nights in a row and spent the rest of the week feeling stiff, migrainey, sore-necked, lethargic and almost sick. Even now, because of the awful heat especially, I haven't really got rid of this painful neck, nor heavy head, and I've developed what feels like a pulled muscle in my back. Yay. Of course, it hasn't helped that I've mostly been regulated to the couch if I want to relax and watch whatever Dad has on TV - there is no way I can sit or lie on the couch that does anything other than make my neck and back far worse. Even in my room or Mum & Dad's room, there're only the beds. What I need are proper, supported, comfortable chairs.

Anyway, all of this is picky, considering that I don't pay any rent, but they're just little examples of how I'm getting to the stage where, even though I don't want to move out, I think I need to. I need my own space. This is depressing, as I'm going to be a LOT poorer this year anyway. I'm going to have a hard time building up any savings again if I move out soon after returning from my holiday - especially as moving out usually requires a certain amount of spending to buy appliances and furniture etc. And the weekly grocery bills will be more than I usually pay as will my bills. I know all of this, I appreciate how good I have it at home financially. I just don't think I can live here if Dad's home all the time. In fact, I know it. I know for a fact that, even if I could stay out of his way a lot, it'd mean a definite deterioration in my health.

The other problem is, though, that I have no one to move out with. Maree said that I could maybe move in with her and Brendan. Well, maybe they'd be easier to get along with than Dad, but I don't think that situation is much different: Three adults, with me moving in to a room in a pre-occupied house. It'd probably be much smaller, too (AND is unairconditioned!). I'm not convinced that's any better than living here. What I want is someone to move into a new place with me and share the rent and the responsibility and keep me company, but, otherwise, not get in my way and vice versa. Someone nice and a little fun. Everyone I know is either too settled where they are, too poor, too far away, or all of the above! One thing, though, with the CRT work is that it wouldn't matter so much where I was living. I don't like having to drive too far to work, but if I was a CRT I could try to get work wherever I was living, rather than having to try to find a house wherever I was working.

Today I spent lotsa money on CAE classes. I'm taking French for Travellers and German for Travellers. The German for Travellers' last class is potientially after I'll leave for the UK, unless I change the dates slightly. I might have to ask the teacher if I can attend an extra class at one of the other times or something to make up for it. I've made appointments with the dentist and the dental surgeon (about getting my wisdom teeth removed. yay.) and suppose I'll have to make an appointment with the doctor about getting any injections for travelling overseas. I'll also need to see about passports. Argh, so much to do!

Spoke to Leonie on IM last night. Now she's engaged, too! Everybody! Well, Maree, Dianne and Leonie, all engaged! It's an epidemic!

(P.S. If you missed that Dianne & Tim got engaged, among other things, you're obviously not keeping up with my shorter LJ posts!)