~Panic stress
2006-04-04 - 2:56 p.m.

Went to the bank in the city today to get travellers' cheques, which everyone assures me I should have because they're so much more secure than just having wads of money and better than trying to draw money out overseas.

So I go and the woman there asks me if I'm just getting travellers' cheques, not some foreign currency, too. I don't know!! Should I get some cash? Pounds, at least, for when I arrive in London? Or maybe some Euros, too, because I'll quickly be in Germany and Paris? Is it better to have some cash, too? Is it cheaper than trying to get some at airports and things? Will the travellers' cheques last me?? Nobody told me to get cash! I'm here for travellers' cheques!

So I said, a little confusedly, no, I was just there for travellers' cheques.

I'm just not equipped to make this kind of on-the-spot decision unless I've planned and thought it through. One of the reasons I spend so much time worrying about what will happen tomorrow/next week/on holiday/next year etc. is that, when I get there, I'm prepared, I make good decisions and everything goes well. When I have to make unexpected on-the-spot decisions that I haven't thought about and gone into beforehand, I can't think clearly and don't always make good decisions. That's one of the reasons that I'm not allowing myself to be really excited about my holiday. If I get excited, I won't think things through and be prepared.

It sometimes makes me a bit negative, saying "this might happen" and "that might happen", but it's not that I expect them to happen, it's that I want to be ready in case they do.