~A Big Whinge
2004-04-01 - 6:08 p.m.

OK, I'll have to update my who's who list before I add this...[edit] OK done!

I remember one of the reasons I hate being a teacher.

Of course, there are many reasons I hate teaching...or, since I don't exactly hate teaching, perhaps it'd be more accurate to say that there are many things I hate about teaching. Obviously, the problem kids really get me down, or any kids who don't seem to be improving in work habits or behaviour at all. There are very few things worse than a real consistently problematic student.

But at the top, perhaps equal with that last one, is the whole workplace/colleague/expectations thing.

You see, yesterday Lien and I missed out on our unit's planning day to be at the final day of our Tribes PD. As a result, Elizabeth, Peggy and Marcie all planned for next term. Elizabeth then came to us after school to go through the term's planner with us. It was all very nice and pleasant, but she was very clear and insistent about certain parts of the planner that we had to be sure to cover. To me, it was obvious: Yesterday the "experienced teachers" discussed us and decided that this term Lien and I inadequately followed the planner and didn't achieve the outcomes satisfactorily.

It's not that this was a totally unfair assessment. Lien and I didn't follow the planner quite as closely as Elizabeth and Marcie. We did, however, stick very closely to the outcomes (which are the important bit), and most of our activities were exactly the same as the 3/4 teachers'! She didn't mention feeling that we hadn't done well enough and, certainly, if we didn't refer to the whole term planner as often as they thought we should, it was probably because we found it rather badly organised. Elizabeth sat down and explained it all very well, so I suppose they handled it in a good way, simply explaining things to us better rather than being negative. I couldn't help picking up the inference, though, and getting rather miffed. Later on, Elizabeth was letting me know that she was available if I needed any help setting up my spelling words homework system, because, apparently, it's very important that the have spelling words to practice. Apart from the fact that I'm not sure I agree with that and have been trying to work out a better system of learning words than the boring learn-then-test method, I picked up rather clearly on the inference that my spelling strategies this term obviously hadn't been good enough.

What crap. Of course making sure students are learning the 100/200 most used words is important, but it's rather annoying (and hypocritical, in a very open/play/multiple intelligences learning oriented school) to have people on the outside think that I'm not doing enough with spelling because I don't send home words for them to learn every week! Lien, however, because she's a more organised sort (and has Elizabeth as her mentor...) obviously must be doing great things with spelling because she's sending words home! The fact that I've been doing word study and word building activities with the kids in their literacy groups and as a whole class in literacy sessions doesn't get noticed, however. Obviously, learning to spell five words by rote is more important than developing the skills to, at the least attempt to, spell any word. Crap, I say!

But it's not just the way other people are constantly telling me how I should be doing things (which, let's face it, as a teacher in only my second year, I probably still need a fair bit of) that annoys me about teaching, it's the way I have to react to that. "Oh stupendous, oh thank-you for criticising my teaching, I'm so greatful that you have shown me the error of my ways and I will find time in my already overloaded planning schedule to implement every little way you believe things should be taught! I'm so glad you crushed my confidence! Thank-you a thousand times!"

OK, in this instance, my confidence obviously isn't crushed, but it's just the first thing. This term was obviously a honeymoon period, now they're going to expect more and I'm already striving really hard just to maintain the standard I've established this term. It's not so daunting this time round, but I still hate it. It still smarts every time I even pick up that suggestion that someone thinks I'm not doing things well enough and I'd rather just snap at everyone to mind their own business and let me get there in my own time and in my own way. It's not even that the advice I get given is unfair or mean, but I'm just not cut out for the expectation of constant improvement and, moreso, the implied or actual criticism that goes with this process. It's just the way teaching is, but it doesn't mean I have to like it! It was all I could do afterward not to complain to Lien. I figured, however, that if Lien hadn't picked up on the implications of Elizabeth's manner and pointed clarification of what we were required to do, there was no reason to get her down about it. Much as I get defensive of myself, I've also become rather protective of Lien (who's gorgeous - not only is she trying to find me a boyfriend, she's spent all afternoon calling me "girlie" hehe).

ONE MORE DAY BEFORE HOLIDAYS!!!

(P.S. I'm sooo sick of kids telling each other there's something on the floor and then crying "April Fool!", even if the kids don't look!)

(P.P.S. Ooooh I had at least a quarter, if not a third of the kids convinced that the Easter Bunny really came and left them an egg in their baskets today! Mwehehehe what fun. The others were convinced that, if it wasn't me, it must've been one of the other teachers in our unit. But I managed to deflect their suspicions without lying. Yay for Aes Sedai practice!)